Do You See What I See?

Acting on assumptions that were wrong – What if you had been right?

Curiosity leads to unexpected discoveries – Hydration and Dehydration

The impact of rejecting acknowledgement

The aim of sharing the story below was/is to invite you to consider times when you may not be/nor have been open to acknowledgment and its potential contribution to both you, the recipient, and the giver.

It also relates to the possibilities of what will be available for participants in the 4-week Magic of Shifting Perspectives program – giving and receiving acknowledgment as you share seeing and hearing things and experiences in new, creative, and fun ways…resulting in feeling great about yourself and the new openings in communication with those important to you.

The Story and Photo
A shortened version of the long story of my having rejected acknowledgment and the intended contribution follows. [The link for the post with the long story is at the end.]

On a day I happened to stop into the office in the community in which I live Gini, the Administrative Assistant, jumped up to show me the piece of a live oak tree root (on the left) which had grown around the head of a sprinkler.

Isaac the maintenance man who had painstakingly removed it, preventing potential damage to a home, had proudly brought it to the office. Gini immediately put it in a cup, on display to show me and others when we happened to come in the office.

She had thought of me, the way I saw and wrote about images and that I might want to write about it in my “Beyond Seeing” column in our community newsletter.

I was not attracted to the image and mentally and verbally dismissed it until we got engaged in seeing faces and other images. Even Isaac, who shook his head initially, got involved, declaring that he saw a lion.

The Message and My Observations
Ultimately as I drove home, I started reflecting on my NOT having accepted Gini’s acknowledgment and a few times in other professional situations I had been dismissive.

In the process, I realized not only had I “ripped myself off” from seeing and owning my power, I had unintentionally diminished the giver.

How about you?
My lessons from this experience, and their messages, lead to the invitation for you to look into your life for past situations and to create an awareness for ones yet to occur.

Check in with yourself:
Are there times when people acknowledge you that you minimize what they’ve said? What we forget is, that in the process of so doing, we are unintentionally diminishing the other person.

If nothing shows up immediately for you, think back. I’m sure at times you’ve brushed off a compliment on how you look – hairdo, piece of clothing, jewelry….and beyond. What about praises for a job well done?

Next time, someone commends you, I invite you to take it in. Pause before saying anything. Then a simple “Thank you” may suffice. Appreciate both yourself and the giver.

I also invite you to do more acknowledging of others. Notice what happens for you when it’s accepted, or rejected, both what occurs with the other person, as well as your own feelings.

The link for the longer version of this story with additional photos and personifications: Are You Rejecting Acknowledgment and Contribution?

A Program for Fun, Play and Ease in Expanding Connection and Communication

Are you looking for a fun “time out”? An opportunity at the end of a day (for many of you) for energized relaxation (as crazy as that may sound)? Plus a start for the week with seeds for seeing situations in new ways?

I was excited and surprised by the responses in the comments on a Facebook post. I had shared what I thought the image below was expressing; then asked two questions regarding it. 

Different Perspective

To see in a video what the responses were, tap/click on the image above or on Different Perspectives. After watching the video, check the description underneath it in “SHOW MORE.”

In addition to listing the responses, at the end of the description, I go into the story of what the segments are.

My excitement came from the fact that the perceptions were all so different and, synchronistically, were/are a demonstration of what’s possible in The Magic of Shifting Perspectives: Creative Ways to Open & Deepen Communication.

It’s a 4 week program starting 9 days from now!  Designed for you to Relax and Have Fun, the Week 1 Focus is on Seeing. Tap/click on the Power of Perspective Shifts for description and details.

The program starts on Monday, April 5th at 8:00 PM U.S. Eastern Time. It is FREE for all those who register by Friday, April 2nd.

I look forward to seeing many of you joining a like-minded community in my interactive Zoom room.

Are you Missing Out as a Result of Unfulfilled Expectations and False Assumptions

3 Wakodahatchee Wetlands IrisesThis post highlights shifting perspectives, and more, as related to experiences with Wetlands Irises I’ve seen in two Wetlands Preserves, each 5 minutes from my home.

My request is that you allow yourself some time to experience the  textures and beauty in the Iris photos featured here today.

Rather than a long background story, suffice it to briefly say that this weekend I was once again disappointed not finding the wild irises I expected/hoped to see.

When I got home from my walk searching for them, a related post with photos from 2012 magically surfaced as I was looking for something else in my computer.

I was moved by the spontaneous poetry that emerged when handling my disappointment then.

Before continuing, I invite you to take a minute or two to be with each of the photos prior to reading the words below them.

The words were ones that had flowed from me, as I responded to the imagery I was seeing and interpreting. In reading them now, I realize that the feelings resulting from my experiences, also came through in the spontaneous verbal expression.

Wild Wetlands Iris - Petals look tissue thin

Tissue paper thin I feel
As the midday sunlight
Shines brightly through me

Wild Wetlands iris poses as a ballerina

Onstage at cloudy dusk
My arms reach up as
Lit by flash
I pirouette in life celebration
Scattered raindrops refresh my soul

Wild Wetlands Iris

This way or that
I luxuriate in the feel
of my velvetlike skin

Though my lifespan and that of my sisters is short
We relish the time we have
The beauty we share
Honoring the Wetlands visitors who seek us out
As well as those who accidentally find us

The brief story of the above irises 
The bottom line story to the wild irises above, relates to the expectations, letdowns and then the excited surprise upon discovering I was wrong! I had gone on an irises’ searching walk during the 2 week time period that they had shown up in previous years. 

When they never appeared, I made up “stories” of why they weren’t there. Then the guard suggested that perhaps the chemical treatment of the area might have unexpectedly destroyed them.

Living in the “made-up stories”, I was even more, excited when a couple of weeks later, I came back and the irises were there! The above 3 photos we’re amongst the couple hundred photos I took over the next week or so.

(You can see more of the story, if you wish, by tapping/clicking on Wild Wetlands Irises in 2012. There are also links to other iris photos from prior years.)

I concluded then that the final lessons for me were yet to be distilled. The biggest reward would be the couple of hundred, or more, iris photos I then had to captivate my senses any time throughout the year.

Self-Reflecting Queries  
Today I invite you, as I did then, to look at your life, at areas in which you like to make discoveries.

As you read and consider the queries, I invite you to see how some of them might relate to connections and relationships you have with others who are important to you.

Are there things to which you look forward on a regular basis? What occurs for you if they don’t happen, or you miss them for some reason?

How do you handle disappointment and unfulfilled expectations?

Look at both happenings such as my “annual Irises” and also those that occur in your relationships with other people.

Are you able to easily accept whatever is, or do you make it mean something is wrong (such as “my chemicals killed them story”) and then live in that?

Lastly are you ultimately able to find the positives in the experience(s)?

In the case of the 2012 Wild Irises, I did find them, and learn from that, experiencing far more than simply enjoying the flowers.

On the other hand, had I not found, I still was ready to finally accept without making myself, or anyone else, wrong. How about you, in your life? Can you accept what is?

I’m still in awe of life’s unexpected surprises and joys when we let go of our attachments as to how we think things should be.

I invite you to be open to surprise or two in the next few days. Treasure whatever it is.

Your Reactions – Responses
Please share in the Leave a Reply section below what your biggest takeaways are from reading and engaging in the photos and words, as well as with the self-reflecting queries.

To whom are you listening? Yourself…or ??

In the last post, I mentioned Andrea Stephens’ video interview with me on the topic of “Easy, Fun and Effective Communication.”  One of the 9 tips about which I spoke was: 

Give your full attention to whomever is talking. 
No multi-tasking. 

Today as I was checking in on some earlier issues, I was reminded of another critical component to that tip and that is:

No mind wandering onto your own story of what you think you might want to say next.

A Relevant Story –

Boy studies a wood knot in Green Cay Wetlands

A few years ago, as I was walking in Green Cay Wetlands and taking photographs of wood knots, I got into conversation with a young boy, Grady, and his mother. I stopped and showed them the Green Cay Wood Knot Lion, still in my camera.

We then discovered another possible lion, or other critter, right under our feet. Grady did not agree with his mother and me on what it was. So the next time I made a discovery, he went down close to inspect it.

Note: You’ll find a link to see a page the Wood Knot images discussed here at the end of this email.***

Grady’s Story-
We continued our walk, made some other “finds”, and then stopped. My new, young friend climbed onto the railing to look down and watch the blue-winged teals swimming.

As I videoed, Grady continued talking about a story that was evidently on his mind from an earlier conversation. His chattering along with the movement of the bird, is in the 32-second, fun video below.

Blue -winged teal swims as boy talks  about something else
If you can’t see the video, click on Blue-Winged Teal

• • • • • • • • • •

Paying attention – listening/not listening  –
If/when you’ve watched, and listened to, the video with the boy chattering, you’ll have heard me break in with the suggestion to look at the water coming out of the duck’s beak. I also was waiting for the bird to open it wings so I could point out the blue to Grad

I cringed when I heard this in playback. It reminded me of how often, I pay attention to my own thoughts and agenda and am not FULLY with the other person. And, I know, this is NOT unique to me.

Relationship queries
I invite you, for the next day, or more, to pay attention to your own listening. Are you always full present to what the other person is saying or are your thoughts going elsewhere?

When you notice you’re not, are you planning on what you are going to say next, concentrating on something else, or is your mind simply wandering?

Suggested actions
If/when you catch yourself, I invite you to stop, apologize to the person who is speaking, if appropriate, and ask for a recap.

Then fully enjoy being in the moment with that person

As always, have fun with this.

• • • • • • • • • •

The above story relates to one of the 9 Tips to Easy, Fun, Effective Communication: Guidelines and “Rules” for Speaking/Writing to Make a Difference. To receive the free PDF of the tips, simply tap/click on 9 Communication Tips

• • • • • • • • • •

Evolving News Story – Mark your calendars.
Monday night, April 4th, at 8:00 PM Eastern time will be the first of 4 classes in the “Magic of Shifting Perspectives” program. Each week will be a different theme covering various creative aspects in communicating and connecting.

• • • • • • • • • •

An Invitation
Is there something in your life you feel is missing or off? … a communication or connection challenge? If so, I invite you to a FREE 30-minute Discovery Session. Simply put your request in the Reply space below this post and I will get back to you.

• • • • • • • • • •

***To see the Wood Knot Images Grady, his mother and I were looking at tap/click on “Eye Catcher Wood Knots – Are You Listening?”.

Can Disagreements Be Fun?

As a reader of Treasure Your Life Now blog, and possibly a follower of mine on Facebook, you are likely familiar with my constant recommendations for taking “eye-catcher” photos.

ANYTHING that catches your eyes is worthy of being photographed, for a variety of reasons. Amongst these are the opportunities for experiencing different perceptions and having fun sharing.

Practicing this regularly can also help pave the way for more ease in “serious” conversations.

A Story
The above purple passion flower caught my eye several years ago. It was on a vine against a tree in a park behind the Little League baseball field where my late-husband Sam and I had gone to watch one of our grandsons and his team play.

Now, as I read the story, I see that as I kept looking at the flower, I felt a little disconcerted. I wrote: “In the picture, all the skinny little petals (or whatever they are called) had the look of string, rather than the delicacy of a flower.”

Sam, at first glance, thought it was a flower made of wire. Then, when reflecting on the imagery later, he decided it was a propellor.

Granddaughter Kaitlyn (age 13 at the time) said it looked like a carousel; then stated that it reminded her of all the hair on a Chinese dragon.

Grandson Ryan, ever practical even then at age 9, said it simply looked like a pretty flower.

When I called the group together one last time, as I was finishing writing the issue of Picture to ponder, Sam pointed out the propellor. Ryan definitely agreed and then Kaitlyn noticed the pentagon.

Sometime after the baseball game, it had turned into a fun conversation with my husband and two of our, at-the-time, young grandchildren. (I’m looking forward to their responses now, 15+ years later.)

The Point of the Above Conversation is to serve as a reminder that one thing, including a situation, can be seen in many different ways, from different perspectives. As I’m thinking about it now, if we save some of these stories, they also have a bit of a legacy aspect .

• • • • • • • • • •

A Relationship Tip – Have Fun Exploring Different Ways of Seeing the Same Thing

I invite you to spend some time with someone close to you exploring what might be different perceptions for each of you of the same image or object. Quite likely you each might be looking at it from different angles.

Notice/Be Aware – Do you have an initial, “charged” response to, already preconceived notions as to what, he or she, will say?

If so, I invite you to reflect. Where else in your life do these “already knowings”, or “excuses,” show up.

Sometimes, for this experiment, it’s helpful to find something to which neither party has a particular attachment.

• • • • • • • • • •
An interview – 9 Tips to Easy, Fun, Effective Communication: Guidelines and “Rules” for Speaking/Writing to Make a Difference

I was excited earlier this week to be interviewed by Andrea Stephens, Neuro Transformational Life Coach. In a lively interview, we discussed 9 Tips for Effectively Communicating.

You can watch that interview now on YouTube – by tap/clicking on the image or on Video Interview.

To receive the PDF of the tips, simply tap/click on 9 Communication Tips.

 

• • • • • • • • • •

Coming Soon – Sometime before the end of March, I will be offering 4 classes  on various creative aspects in communicating and connecting. Each week will be a different theme.

This first series will be FREE and likely offered on Monday nights at either 7 or 8 PM Eastern. If you know now that you would be interested, please leave a comment in the Reply section below with your time preferences and any comments.

• • • • • • • • • •

The Invitation
Is there something in your life you feel is missing or off? … a communication or connection challenge? If so, I’m offering you a Complimentary, 30-minute Discovery Session to explore one of your challenges. 

Simply indicate in the Leave a Reply section below that you would like book an appointment and I will email you a link to my Calendar.

NOTE: The address you are required to give, for security reasons, in order to leave a comment is seen only by me.  It is not made Public.

 

Stepping out on a branch – What is your story?

In the last two posts, I used Lorikeets to personify being in active communication with another.

Today I’m using the Purple Gallinule to inspire you to break through
blocks you might have or to simply enjoy the bird.

Radiating sunrise over Delray Beach ocean

Purple Gallinule on the stem of a Fire Flag plant

What is your experience as you look at the photo?

If you were to personify the bird, what do you think he/she is feeling?

• • • • • • • • • •

When I shared this image several years ago, I wrote:

“We could get heavy and significant about the bird, make a determination that he is struggling and “holding on tight,”
or
we could say he’s simply relaxing with his wings spread out, enjoying the scenery.

Then the Gallinule went further out on the stem.

purple gallinule in Wakodahatchee Wetlands - dancing or stuck?What is your first reaction when you see this photo?

• • • • • • • • • •

We could state that he is warily taking his next step, or we could say he’s dancing (my initial response when I first viewed the photo.)

Bottom line, we can make all kinds of interpretations and stories as to what’s happening with the gallinule.

Who is to determine which is the “correct” one?

On the other hand, we can simply be with the beauty of his colors, the lines of his legs and amazing feet, or however you see it…possibly opening up new ways of looking at our challenges.

• • • • • • • • • •

Self-Reflecting Queries:

Reflect on your responses to my above queries and/or my “stories”. I’ve brought my interpretations into the picture. What were yours?

I invite you to check further in with yourself:

Are there places in your life where you are so busy making interpretations, “figuring” something out, that you are missing the opportunity of having fun?

If so, what thoughts and/or emotions would you need to release right now to have that pleasure.

  • Might it be perfectionism?
  • judgment?
  • the need to be right?
  • anger?
  • something else?

If you see the block to having fun, please take the action of letting go so you can have pleasure in this moment.

• • • • • • • • • •

Question:
At this point you might once again be wondering, “What does the photo of another bird, a  Purple Gallinule, have to do with me and communication?”

Answer:
I’ve found that many times it’s easier to find/see answers to the nagging internal thoughts, when we look outside of ourselves and interpret things we see… external stories that are safe.

Bottom Line:  
There are creative ways, unique to each individual, that will be discovered and used to find answers to my clients’ perceived challenges as we work together.

Effective communication in relationships is key.

• • • • • • • • • •

A Request: 
As I start focused development on Communication and Connection coaching, I would appreciate it if you would share with me what problems/challenges you think you and your peers might be having in communication and/or connecting with themselves and others important to you/them.

Perhaps they are:

  • not being listened to?
  • been told that you are the one not listening?
  • issues with anger?
  • seemingly dead-end disagreements?
  • not sure what to do next?
  • feelings of isolation?
  • disconnection?
  • other….?

In summation:
Please reply to this post in the Leave a Reply section below, with answers to any of the above or feedback you care to give and, perhaps, a list of one or more problems/challenges in communication and connection of which you are aware.

In appreciation:
I offer you a Complimentary, 30-minute Discovery Session to explore one of your challenges. Do you feel like that something is missing in your life now… that perhaps this is coming from communication issues?

Simply indicate in the Leave a Reply section below that you would like book an appointment and I will email you a link to my Calendar.

NOTE: The address you are required to give, for security reasons, in order to leave a comment is seen only by me.  It is not made Public.

Active Listening Results

Talking, active listening, effective communication lead to closeness, connection and love,” as demonstrated by the Lorikeets whom I’m using in this announcement.

I have reframed my business to focus on serving as a Communication and Connection coach.

Using fun, uplifting and creative methods, my clients discover solutions to challenges, become more deeply connected with themselves and those important to them.
They experience a new-found freedom with nothing to fix!

If you are yearning to get unstuck in a specific area, I invite you to book a complimentary, discovery session with me.

Make note in the Reply section below that you’d like me to get back to you with my calendar link.